One evening last month while studying a book by one of my favourite writers, John Eldredge, titled -“The Journey of Desire”, he asked me to set the book down for a few minutes and ask myself the following question –
“Will my life ever be exactly what I so deeply desire it to be, in a way that cannot be lost?”
Well, it took me more than a moment to ponder this question. So I started wondering if people, when asked the same query would click past it or would some people decide that the query deserved some enlightened enlightening and honest thought, I have been thinking about it for weeks.
So, if the query triggers any emotion within you, I hope the following can help you productively take that journey. If you don’t give a rip – have a wonderful lifestyle and hit the”next” button on your apparatus.
I am not using some of John’s stuff in this article other than his first question. What follows is my spin on the value of this question and the thoughts, thoughts, questions or feelings it may bring to the surface for you and you personally.
Then I frequently like to confess, I have been on this particular road of life for more years, and the journey has had its share of opportunities and successes and life-changing and catastrophic failures and disappointments. But as I have travelled from 1 year to the next, sure I’d targets, plans, dreams, hopes, and desires but a lot of them they just sort of stayed on the sidelines as I travelled the world speaking and training crowds in twenty-six countries.
Additionally – as an author of over seventy-five publications including a million-seller and a couple of foreign bestsellers I kept preaching to other people what life was instructing me the good, the bad and the ugly – and – often not heeding my wisdom, classes, and experience.
So here I sit asking myself -“Is my life turning out how I really, deeply want it to?” And the answer – no and yes. And it is the no’s that cause the most pain and even rips. Sure, I’m pleased with the yes – that would not be? And just to be clear this guide is not a cathartic release of most my errors and frustrations to earn either your shame or your scorn, I just wish to split the worth both short and long term in addition to the potential personal insights that can alter or change the direction or trajectory of some area of your life.
I would like to provide just five areas regarding this question for your consideration.
1)Adversity or a blessing –
In life, earlier or later, most of us must overcome adversity, challenges, and pain of some kind but we also all have understood lots of blessings, too many to count in this article, suffice it to say that if you’re reading this you have experienced more positives than negatives during your life up to now, but frequently these results can depend on how you choose to define or interpret the idea of – positive & negative.
Irrespective of the number of negatives, you might believe you’ve experienced I’ll guarantee you have had blessings. So, the question becomes – have you let any of the images get in the way of achieving or attaining your life needs at this stage in your life as you hoped they’d have proven by now? If so – why and which ones?
2)Your response to stuff you did not request –
There are three ways in life to deal with disappointments, setbacks or failures accept them, deny them learn from them. The initial two sadly often cause us to stay stuck before, settle for what is instead of what might be, and many times escape back to past secure zones, attitudes or mindsets that will ensure we never achieve our hopes, needs or dreams.
The only way to keep moving ahead is to accept the reality of the problems or challenges as required of life to become better, more educated or more powerful. And with no life strategy, it’s assumed that dreams and needs will always be that – dreams and desires that you hope one day will show up just because you showed up. Sorry – that’s not the way it functions, and I will say from personal experience that just showing up is not enough.
3)Do dreams matter –
Sometimes our fantasies or desires are just outside our reality of what we are willing to pay or sacrifice or do to have them become real for us. This does not mean we should dream for what we feel could be potential or appropriate, but it does mean we need to make the adjustments necessary, learn the right skills or take the lack of success with poise and maturity.
4)Who or what can you trust –
Sometimes life seems to know what’s better for us in the long run than we do. What do I mean by existence in the sentence? Experience for all us is a collection of mishaps, scenarios, individuals, events, and effects which most of us get. While others may lead to pain and disappointment, some of them can teach us. Some help us grow while others keep us stuck. As these various conditions come into our own life if it’s the flat tire or a new lasting relationship, a new profession or a severe health challenge they provide us with the opportunity to do three different things
– 1a)Learn from them, b)Deny or avoid them and c)Ask life simply -“what am I supposed to do with this?” In the end, we all get internal guidance regardless of what you want to call Devine assistance, Universal Consciousness, Hunches, Insight – whatever – in the end life is a teacher and sends us all kinds of stuff and people to help us understand. Does this mean life is a”man of God or Alien?” Again, call it what you may but allow me to ask you – have you ever wondered what to do with a challenge or a situation and also you got this internal message, and you did not follow it, and things got screwed up? Gotten this personal message and followed and things worked out in your favour? Well, what exactly was this voice? I don’t have a clue but what I do know is which approach do you believe might, in the end, be ideal, and we could trust it or ignore it?
5)When it is over it’s over – We are given. Hence, several years to emphasise, expect, desire, fantasy, yes and wonder, work, yes and play encounter a wide variety of lifestyle outcomes. But ultimately the way our journey progresses whether towards our needs or far from them is a combination of a massive array of choices, decisions, actions, beliefs, etc.
Here’s part of the problem, we don’t have a clue as to where these choices wind up, and decisions will lead us. We don’t have the slightest understanding of who let go of these decisions will impact us within the long run and who we make into our own life. In the long term, this is a good life strategy because can you imagine what your life would be like if you could plan step, every activity and choice and control the outcomes? I understand what you are thinking -“yes, I’d adore this privilege – I could establish the quality of my life and my fate.” However, what if your choices were limited by negative emotions or approaches such as the lack of knowledge or knowledge, regret or fear or even accurate information – do you believe that could make some moves?
In the long run, we’re all” from here” at a certain point, so the actual question is, are you living daily doing your very best to create the best of that day or supposing you will fix or change things tomorrow? Excellent luck with this one.